tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post6522563164707982014..comments2022-07-28T00:53:17.738-07:00Comments on Opinionated, Baby: 16 Things I Wish I'd Known About Babies Before I Had Onehayleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11459191748010876691noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-55120858637200522802013-01-31T10:20:50.191-08:002013-01-31T10:20:50.191-08:00Thank you for this insight Dannie. I am expecting ...Thank you for this insight Dannie. I am expecting my first, and much of what you wrote is how I feel toward parenting. It's nice to know there are others out there who feel that way.( I know there are, but it's nice to hear it when you need to hear it!)sara groveshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10234094351650705948noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-34015508424544673262013-01-31T08:16:50.528-08:002013-01-31T08:16:50.528-08:00You nailed it! Totally agree with everything. Espe...You nailed it! Totally agree with everything. Especially the part about being a combination of bored and busy. It's probably the strangest part of motherhood...especially if you are a first time mom. Sarahhttp://sarahstowell.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-90192695838875557072013-01-30T21:27:35.556-08:002013-01-30T21:27:35.556-08:00I really enjoyed this, thank you hayley :)
I also...I really enjoyed this, thank you hayley :) <br />I also have three children, and cannot believe how many times people have commented and raised eyebrows at me when they find this out. People who do know me, thought for sure I'd stop at one or two. People who don't know me, desperately try to rack their brains and find a way to put me into a box of some sort. Why... because with one school aged child, one toddler and one baby, I am supposed to be frazzled, underslept, depressed and covered in fecal matter, vomit and toddler food, no? Well, sometimes, yes. But mostly not. Because I decided long ago, that the way I would parent would be whatever suited me best and left stress out of the equation as much as possible. My two oldest generally sleep on the couch. Because that's where they like it, nearby to mom, and they can listen to music together which lulls them into dreamland. And I know this will not go on forever. Baby sleeps with me, leaving hubby to sleep in a separate room, and our relationship is awesome because it's become a sort of "my place or yours" thing. And we all get eight-plus hours of sleep per night. They have all the time in the world to discover how tough the world can be. My job is to make them believe in the good and feel safe and loved, to whatever extent that goes. They get cuddled when they need it, and certainly held when they want it. But they get time outs, etc. as well. I teach yoga and dance classes, this is my me time as well as my income. My nipples hurt badly with each one, so straight away I bought nipple shields each time, while I was being told continually that it would be best if I didn't use them. But it was less stress on me, and thus on everyone, so I used them. Admittedly, I was very triggered by others comments, but learned quickly to speak up. My body, my babies, our lives. I break all the 'rules', I suppose... mainly because there aren't really any to follow in the first place ;) Daniellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02759190071429441638noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-80361089725485118942013-01-30T17:55:31.526-08:002013-01-30T17:55:31.526-08:00I took my son to the chiropractor many times for h...I took my son to the chiropractor many times for his spitting up, and it never subsided. He had to grow out of it on his own :(hayleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11459191748010876691noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-26849165680932397222013-01-30T17:30:48.405-08:002013-01-30T17:30:48.405-08:00Solving the issue of acid reflux is easy!!! Go to...Solving the issue of acid reflux is easy!!! Go to see a family wellness chiropractor and your baby will sleep much easier :) Thanks for the posts ladies. It has really given me a lot of insight and made me feel more "normal".Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-73826489565218609812013-01-30T09:23:12.628-08:002013-01-30T09:23:12.628-08:00One of the best things I was ever told was that ba...One of the best things I was ever told was that babies need to learn to self sooth...you won't be there to hold their hand their whole lives so they need to learn to fall asleep on their own. Let them cry for a little while...it doesn't hurt them, and as a new parent putting them down is the very first stage in letting them go (something that is very hard for me)...<br />The other thing to remember (I hope I don't insult anyone), your baby isn't the first baby in the world, not the first to cry or the first to have 'issues', so yes the 'village' is extremely important for talking to others and figuring out new ideas for problem solving.<br />Cheers to a great blog!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-52585041607739949322013-01-30T08:48:26.663-08:002013-01-30T08:48:26.663-08:00The acid reflux thing seems to be popping up again...The acid reflux thing seems to be popping up again and again. They really need to spread more awareness about it, I think!<br />hayleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11459191748010876691noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-36190614617729064822013-01-30T07:39:47.379-08:002013-01-30T07:39:47.379-08:00I would add also that some babies can get acid ref...I would add also that some babies can get acid reflux. I never knew it could happen until I had not only one, but then two who had/have it (who knew, they can actually grow out of it too!) They both took medication right from the beginning and my youngest still does. Also, there are many symptoms of acid reflux that I didn't know about such as hiccups, vomiting and coughing. If you are concerned, talk to your pharmacist or doctor.<br />Besides that, I don't have anything new to add, but I hope you don't mind I wanted to comment on the points you made:<br />- I really like your point in number two about the anti-shaking campaign. Only when you become a parent, can you understand how someone could possibly shake a poor innocent baby.<br />- I think this sentence "If you expect and accept them (regression), it's much less frustrating to deal with." from number four is VERY important. After three babies myself, this has made a huge difference the third time around. Just accept the change, change your method to find another way that works and move on. It will get better. <br />- Number 6: AMEN sista :)<br />- Number 9: I wasn't able to breast-feed my first two so when I succeeded with the third, and he started the cluster feeds, I was like what is this??? I really wish someone had told me that it was normal and that it would pass.<br />- 11: YES!!!<br />- 12: I totally didn't get this until the last baby. And it has made a HUGE difference in baby's routine now. Getting to sleep is so much easier if I get him down before the overtiredness sets in.<br />- 14: Best thing to do is follow your mother's intuition....it is real and it is there for a reason.<br />- Number 15: I found that this awkward phase ties into your comment about just accepting it doing the best that you can. It's not a very fun time, but if you accept it and make an effort to get on top on things and get out when you can, it will pass.<br />- Also, I have to agree with the first comment about the Mom guilt. It is a horrible thing. I haven't figured out if it will ever go away; I assume not, since my children are 12 years, 3 years, and 9 months, and I still feel it every day of my life. But, life continues and I know that my kids love me despite my imperfections or perhaps because of my imperfections, and you how I know that? Because they tell me every day :) <br />This is a great post Hayely, and I will definitely pass it on!Lauriehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16689259699773191430noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-88674779606295263752013-01-30T07:10:49.187-08:002013-01-30T07:10:49.187-08:00Perfectly written!! The only thing I would add is ...Perfectly written!! The only thing I would add is the searing pain when my milk first came in. No one EVER tells you that. I've had 3 C-sections and those were less painful than that!! Now I tell my friends about to have their firsts to expect your boobs to be near explosive:)<br /><br />And yay for "the village".....so important!!<br /><br />MichelleUnknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04468618752857362138noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-81663638729025917262013-01-30T07:08:47.193-08:002013-01-30T07:08:47.193-08:00By the time you end up having another baby- there ...By the time you end up having another baby- there may be things that you forget- it's okay to reach out to that "village" of support- we don't have to be superheros and know all- all the time- expectually with the lack of sleep we experience for about 10-14 years :)Rachelnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-8918574506235140382013-01-30T06:22:07.671-08:002013-01-30T06:22:07.671-08:00Thanks, ladies :)Thanks, ladies :)hayleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11459191748010876691noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-41380938846157300312013-01-30T05:47:03.328-08:002013-01-30T05:47:03.328-08:00This is one of the most wisest, well-articulated &...This is one of the most wisest, well-articulated "what's normal" posts on new babies I've ever read! Sharing this all over the place! :0)MomLaurhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09569799526837581306noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-75418915204774798032013-01-30T05:42:44.318-08:002013-01-30T05:42:44.318-08:00Taylor's acid reflux nearly killed me until it...Taylor's acid reflux nearly killed me until it was figured out. I just figured I'd have another relatively "easy" baby. No one tells you that the second one could end up being the most needy baby ever born!! (And I still love him with all my heart)<br /><br />Great post--you totally nailed it :)Lisanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-21627887545067438402013-01-30T05:03:29.516-08:002013-01-30T05:03:29.516-08:00I will never forget the night I left Olivia in her...I will never forget the night I left Olivia in her crib (which she hated) and walked away. My mom found me sitting on the steps bawling. "if I go back in there, I'll kill her" was all I could say. I had a baby with heartburn. Who tells you that babies get heartburn?? No one! All I knew was that I this 10lb bundle of red faced rage and NOTHING would soothe it. My mom sat down next to me and we just ignored the baby for 10 minutes. She's probably been scarred for life and will have deep seated psychological problems as an adult. But we made it through that night. And the next one. Parenting is takin what comes, one horrible event after another. And in between the horrible is the joy. Which is why we have more than one child and the human race is allowed to continue. :) great post. I loved reading it!Katnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-919053430894516092.post-64751765222957441672013-01-30T04:40:07.853-08:002013-01-30T04:40:07.853-08:00You will screw up. You will feel overwhelming guil...You will screw up. You will feel overwhelming guilt. And your baby will be just fine.<br /><br />I don't know how many hours I spent thinking I was screwing my kids up for life, thinking they'd be mentally scarred by me crying every time I fed them, or by that one time Simon fell asleep in the jolly jumper (how could that NOT lead to a life-long trampoline-related narcolepsy problem?!!). I apologized for not being the mom they deserved, for not having a nice nursery for them, for often being too depressed to be much fun.<br /><br />I didn't need to worry. They're fine. Every minute I spent feeling badly about all of that was wasted. <br /><br />There's a lot of pressure to be a perfect mom, and a lot of opinions and information out there about how to do that (most of it conflicting, of course). I wish someone had told me that being imperfect is not the end of the world, and that babies are extremely forgiving. :)Kathleenhttp://disregardtheprologue.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.com